He Left Me
By Janet E. Hartwick Sterk
with all the unresolved disagreements, with all the unspoken words of love and longing,
with all the wordless apologies and desires to repair. He left me
with the desire to take it back, to not waste a single moment in disconnect. He left me
with the complications of forming adult relationships with our adult children. He left me
with dreams unfinished.
He left me with debt and financial stress.
He left me with a pole barn filled to the ceiling
bulging with tools and machines and equipment and supplies unnamable. He left me
with 400 feet of driveway to snow blow, with 2 acres to mow, and brush to haul, gardens
to tend, and a house to manage.
He left me with a furnace that failed, a water softener that broke, and plumbing that
leaked.
He left me with a septic system to replace. He left me
with clothes in his dresser and shirts hanging like lonely musty drapes behind his closet
doors.
He left me with an unfinished two-part life.
He left me with an empty bed.
with all the wordless apologies and desires to repair. He left me
with the desire to take it back, to not waste a single moment in disconnect. He left me
with the complications of forming adult relationships with our adult children. He left me
with dreams unfinished.
He left me with debt and financial stress.
He left me with a pole barn filled to the ceiling
bulging with tools and machines and equipment and supplies unnamable. He left me
with 400 feet of driveway to snow blow, with 2 acres to mow, and brush to haul, gardens
to tend, and a house to manage.
He left me with a furnace that failed, a water softener that broke, and plumbing that
leaked.
He left me with a septic system to replace. He left me
with clothes in his dresser and shirts hanging like lonely musty drapes behind his closet
doors.
He left me with an unfinished two-part life.
He left me with an empty bed.
Janet E. Hartwick Sterk has been a writer her entire life. Her work is posted on her website blog https://janetsterkhealingjourneys.com. She has been asked to do readings of her work including a recent poetry and music event focusing on nature. She studies privately with Patricia Francisco, creative nonfiction professor at Hamline College’s MFA program, St. Paul, Minnesota and writing coach Kathie Giorgio at All Writers’ Workplace & Workshop. She is currently working on her memoir, based on her personal transformation following her husband’s sudden death. She writes poetry and prose as well as some fiction. Ms. Sterk graduated from Bethel Seminary in St. Paul, Minnesota with a master’s degree in marriage and family therapy. A psychotherapist in private practice, she specializes in relationship therapy and trauma recovery. She lives both in St. Paul and northern Wisconsin on the south shore of Lake Superior. She has two adult children and five grandchildren.